For many years, Mon Geek and I ploughed parallel furrows in time. WE had any number of mutual friends, but never spoke. Which was just as well, because when we eventually did speak, we didn't stop for a fortnight, and then began a relationship so that we needn't ever stop talking again. The news broke among our friends like a tidal wave. "Ah, you know what?" they queued up to say, shaking their heads sagely at what I was getting myself into this time. "He'll have you watching Dr Who for days on end..."
Practically the only thing I knew about him was, in fact, that he was a Dr Who fan. I knew little else, being as how he was an irredeemable geek and therefore didn't go out. (I'm kidding. No, really, I am. Don't let him beat me.) Within our social circle, which is full of Dr Who fans, he was widely acknowledged as the king, the most knowledgeable, the geek de la geek.
So I was not expecting that my views on Dr Who (William Hartnell has never been bettered, Daleks are cute, and new Dr Who is nothing like as good because the sets don't wobble and the effects are too professional) to go down well with this geek. I was expecting days of horror, strapped in some kind of hideous BDSM chair with a sonic screwdriver in my back and my eyelids clamped open in front of hours and hours of David Tennant gurning on a plasma screen like a scrawny bug-eyed chicken. And that I'd be beaten if I fell asleep.
But he was not in the least like that. He's been pretty good all told. And in the process I remembered that not all Dr Who fans are addicted to David Tennant and spanking bright posh effects that cost more than the 20p Tom Baker had at his disposal back in the day. (And sometimes, Tom, you'd have done better to buy a couple of Wham bars and have done with it.)
In fact, Mon Geek has been very gentlemanly, delighting in sharing his old videos with me, laughing with me over the rubbish effects, and not shouting at me for cracking jokes ovr the dialogue. So, to all my friends: yes, you were right. He has had me watching Dr Who for days on end. But don't be afraid; I don't need rescuing. It's not nearly as bad as you'd think.
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